Sorry for my Delay
Originally written on April 1 2020
Sorry for my delay….. things have been CRAZY….
Have you ever written that email? because I totally have. SO friends, this is a blog post I wrote before COVID-19 blew up what is life as we know it. While things might be different now, I still think the sentiment holds up so I want to share it. For perspective though, it was written before a lot of is had ALL this downtime on our hands. It kind of makes me LOL because what I was trying to get across is that we all deserve to slow and we all continue to stress ourselves out…. More to come on that when I have some time to process everything myself. For now, here are some thoughts, let me know what you think!
Why are we all so stressed out?
Friends, this is a topic near and dear to my heart. If you know me, you know I am a natural overthinker, worrier, and chronic people-pleaser. I tend to overwork and over-commit.
It has led me into some serious burn out, fatigue, panic attacks and high levels of stress. I have learned the hard way that stress can lead to serious health concerns. I thought it was my fault and I just couldn’t handle my career or a normal workload.
I thought it was just me but the more I talk to friends and colleagues, the more I have to ask, WHY ARE WE ALL SO STRESSED OUT?
In this modern day, we are always on. Whether it’s answering emails when you first wake up in the morning or finishing notes late into the evening, we are always on. Between social media, emails, texts, online portals, and access to work at the touch of a finger, it is almost impossible to turn off. And even worse, it is expected that we are available every second of the day.
Seriously, how many times have you sent an email titled “Sorry for my delay…” because you took a day to get back. OR on the other end, how many times have you been pissed because it took someone 2 days to respond to your email (spoiler: it me!). It happens to the best of us— on both ends.
How many times have you sent (or received) a text “after this week ,things will die down…” or “all good here, just really busy with work, life and all the things.”
Yeah, we’ve all been there
So, the question still stands “Why are we all so stressed out?”
Personally, I think we put all our value in how successful we are, how much we accomplish on a daily basis, and how much we get done. We believe that more is better and less is a failure. We are taught from a young age that academic accomplishment = ultimate success— the higher you reach, the better you are.
Our self-worth is determined by how much we accomplish in our careers.
We are taught that our accomplishments determine how much value we contribute to the world.
I know I have fallen into this trap. The more I can cross off my to-do list, the better I feel about my day. When I was in the depths of my burnout, I thought the problem was I wasn’t doing enough. (Fun fact: I was doing wayyyyy too much) After 7 years in school, I so badly wanted to succeed and be the best Physical Therapist I could ever be. I did so at the expense of my mental and physical health.
Don’t get me wrong, succeeding in our careers and accomplishing our goals is pretty badass. The problem comes with the idea that we are ONLY as good as what we accomplished that day or that year.
We are so much more than our accomplishments.
We are all worthy of happiness and love regardless of what we accomplish.
And just as important, we all deserve to REST.
We all deserve some time off no matter what.
We deserve to do absolutely NOTHING every once and a while.
And you know what?
Resting, truly turning off, and taking a break actually make us more productive and more successful.
So why are we all so stressed out?
Well, it’s complicated but at the end of the day, we don’t give ourselves the rest we need.
How do we stop the stress cycle? Well, that is a whole other post, but for now…
here are my top 5 favorite ways to reduce stress:
Get outside: Go for a walk outside and don't bring your phone. Just walk and breathe and keep moving until you’re ready to head back home.
Plan one day a month to do absolutely NOTHING: One of my intentions for the past two years has been to spend one day a month with Chris where we have absolutely nothing planned. We sleep in, we eat breakfast in bed, we go for a walk or work in the yard, we have a beautiful dinner together— we basically do whatever it is that feels good that day.
Read a trashy novel: I LOVE books, seriously love books but lately, I have fallen into the pattern of only reading books for business or professional growth. Last month, I read a book for FUN. I read a couple of pages each night and got lost in the story. The best part of reading is getting lost in the story. I personally love reading mysteries or thrillers but pick your poison.
Try a new exercise: Exercising itself is great for stress reduction in general but adds in an element of novelty and double stress reduction! When you are trying something new, your brain can only focus on the task at hand which helps you get out of the stress cycle of whatever else is going on in your life.
Treat yourself: Pick something that makes you feel good and treat yourself to it. That something small like getting your favorite snack or a manicure. You might splurge for something bigger like a massage or a session in the infrared sauna.
These are just a few of my favorite ways to de-stress but there are so many more. Stay tuned for a post on how to stop the stress cycle and more ways to de-stress. At Live Good, Feel Good we offer Lifestyle coaching to help you tackle your daily schedule AND create rituals and habits that serve you and feel good. Want to learn more? Book a 20-minute FREE Wellness consult:)
How timely that I wrote this sentiment a week before we quarantined? I do truly believe we deserve to rest. So, if you have the opportunity to rest right now, please do it. For yourself and everyone who can’t, okay?